Saturday, December 21, 2013

Chapter #34: 聖誕夜驚魂

已经许久没写部落格了,
繁忙的课业,繁忙的人生,
去年今天,还担心着世界末日,
而时间,在一转眼就过去了。

不过这次的重点,却是在圣诞当中,
一个充满了第一次的圣诞~

前两天,去了朋友家庆祝圣诞过夜,
体验了人生中第一片星光夜空,
得到了人生中第一只“雪人”,
以及第人生中一次,
与他人父母交谈得如此自在轻松 ~

隔天,收到了人生中第一本 year planner,
也是人生中第一份自制礼物;
自己也送出了人生中第一份自制礼物,
也明白了为他人付出所换来的笑容,
是多么的幸福甜美 ~


谢谢你,
为我做了一本自己也想要的书,
对不起,
因为说了自己不是个会用它的人 >< (想问你听到时什么感想? ^^'')
(不过为了你会用的啦~ :P)
谢谢你,
与不成材的我做朋友,
也谢谢你,
陪我渡过了许许多多的一年 ♥


起初的冷漠,现在的交心,
未来,还有什么等着我们去发掘呢?
不过,只要有你在身边,
以及我们那一伙好友,
不论未来是好是坏,
都是狂欢无悔的一生~!!


谢谢你的礼物 ~ 


Monday, September 16, 2013

Chapter #33 : 诗

我喜欢静静写诗的时间,
把每个你都化为美丽的诗句。

不论是思考、幻想,
还是写作的时刻,
每分每秒,都是想你的时刻;
而随之,每个上扬的嘴角,
都是想念你的表情。

今天,总共想了你52次,
比昨天多了6次;
明天呢

Saturday, September 7, 2013

Chapter #32 : Zero. ONE

It may be a lil' late, but still.... exam's done!!! 
And more importantly, it has been 1 full year since I first entered IMU!!! 
Time flies so fast, it kinda makes you wonder what have you've been doing all your life. 

Anyway, my uni life till now's been a fun journey.
A lot of happy memories, crazy friends, & awkward yet shining moments; 
An equal share of tears, regretful mistakes, deceitful lies & shifting bonds;
A life I'd never imagine one year ago.

Am I content with it? Yeah.
Am I happy with it? Maybe.
Could've things gone better? Of course.
Would I have chosen another life? Definitely not!

I've made my fair share of enemies, and even more that dislike me;
I've gain a group of friends, and some that I can share my heart with;
I've learnt to ride a bike, and got past my fear of water;
I've had my heart broken, and realized that some guys are worthy of your trust;
I can go on and on, but what's most important is,
I've grown to be a better me than I was.

My wish for the future?
- To be even closer to my closest friends.
- Learn to be honest, especially towards myself.
- To start a new beginning with those that I've hurt.
- To be able to look into your eyes and tell you the truth. 
and of course, to be a better me than I am now.

Thanks everyone for the wonderful year,
and may our bonds be stronger, and our hearts even more so.... Cheers!!

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Chapter #30: Head-xplosion

Do you believe in Horoscopes?

Well, I'm an Aquarius. 

I'm quirky. I'm innovative.
I'm analytic. I'm occasionally oblivious.
I'm smart. I'm ....honest?
I'm unpredictable. I'm autonomous.
I'm novel seeking. I'm gifted.

Yet with all my reasoning & logic,
I can never grasp what's in your head.
You're a mystery. 
A puzzle waiting to be solved.
But am I your solver?

All this thinking is giving me head-xplosions. *poof*

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Chapter #29 : 心声 (i)

有时总觉得有太多的话要说,却无法完整的表达。想说就每个说一点吧~
欢迎光临,我的内心世界。

1. 最近总有种种疑问,开始不断怀疑自己,也怀疑别人话中背后的含义。

2. 近年来,我为了太多事,做出了太多改变;现在的我,还算是真正的我吗?

3. 人生有许多坚持,也有许多不可能;我的坚持,又是否有可能呢?

4. 从很多方面来说,我搞砸了许多。想回到过去,真的那么困难吗?

5.  我在你心中,是什么位置?理想的,又是什么?

6.  黑色的迷惑,往往比白色的残忍来的痛。

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Chapter #28 : 喜欢你

我不想保护你,因为你不需要被保护; 
我不想迎合你,因为你不需要被迎合;
我不想仰慕你,因为你不需要被仰慕; 
我猜, 我想喜欢你... 
而这,并不在意你是否想要被喜欢  ♥

Sunday, June 23, 2013

迟来の礼物

首先,要向你说声道歉... 从你说希望听听别人对你的第一印象与现在的感觉时,明明就开始这篇部落格,却因为种种事情和改善而一拖再拖,搞到现在才放上来。 距离你的生日,也过了一个多月了(汗)。所以说, 希望你大人有大量,接受我这份迟来的礼物吧~! >_<
*其实也不知道你会不会看到这篇部落格 (囧) *

怎么说呢.... 第一次见到你,也不算是什么认识吧~ 纯粹是瞄了你一眼,而潜意识(?)上对你有点儿印象罢了^^''... 而“正式”的遇见你时,则是在开课第一天! 就不知不觉中,注意到你了吧~  当时的感觉,可以用简单の几句来形容 :

‘很可爱的女孩呢’
‘好像在哪里看过似的’
‘不知有没有机会认识~’
‘不知道是哪班的’
‘怎么向这个方向走来的?’
‘O.O’

现在回想起也觉得自己很囧... 不过呢,也不知不觉中,我们也认识了,也属于同一个党里~ 而对你的第一印象嘛.... 真要说的话,应该是冷漠吧.... 感觉上与你有点距离,好像很难沟通似的 ^_^'' 不过呢,当时又很想认识你多些,结果就搞得自己整个都很奇怪 (哭 T_T) 还记得有一次不知是怎么回事,就突然地问了你一句是否有男友,超尴尬的!!! 可是当时又真的很想知道,所以就....
简单来说,对你的第一感觉,就是你散发着一种难以接近,却让人想靠近的神秘感吧~
如拼图般迷惑,如黑夜般莫测; 这也算是你的特色吧~! :)

而经过了接近一年的时间,也经历了这么多事,起初的冷漠感也不再那么明显了...虽说有时还是有那么一点点的感觉 ^_^'' 现在对你的印象嘛... 是一个很酷的女孩!  不论是穿著时尚还是性格,你就是有你的自我风格。再加上,你现在可以说是我认识中最有创作天分的女孩~ 两者加起来,让人有种 ‘你不是读设计真是太浪费了!!!’ 的感觉 (笑)。还有,感觉上你是很独立,总有自己的坚持与信念,这也是我很欣赏你的一点 :D

..... 说是这么说啦,不过你有时还是有点呆呆的啦 xP 记得你会分自己的午餐给乌鸦吃,还有在云顶时想帮一只蟑螂,都不知你是说你善良,纯真还是可爱呢~ 有时呢,你又很俏皮,总有些奇怪的点子.... 算是爱玩的心灵吧! 对了,你为人也很直白,总把喜欢的与不喜欢的,毫无掩饰地说出来,这也是我喜欢你的一点 :)

不过呢,最让人感兴趣的,就是你的歌声和笑容。不知为何,只要看到你笑,自然而然就会跟着微笑起来~ 可能是因为你的笑总是那么的单纯与真诚,而这对习惯伪笑的我算是种... 文化冲击? (笑) 至于你的歌声嘛~ 先不说你可以达到超高音这点,你的声音真的很动听! 都不知被你感动了多少回了说 ^_^ 而如果要说你有什么缺点... 应该是你那无时无刻都说要减肥的性格吧 =_= 相信我(们),你真的不需要做什么减肥了~现在的你,看起来就很完美啦 :3

想过把你的照片放上来,不过想想没经过你的同意就酱做的后果.... 还是算了 /.\

总而言之,这就是我对你的感觉,满意了吧? :P
当然,希望在接下来的日子里,能更加了解你的性格,所以... 请多多指教咯! ^^

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Monday, June 10, 2013

Chapter #26 : Confession

不知多久没有这种感觉了....
失望、痛恨、悲哀 、无助 ...
更可笑的是,作为导火线的,是一句无心的话....
我知道是自己想太多,我知道你是无心的,不过我就无法控制这份心态....

不知有多久没驾车了.... 也忘了自己到底还会不会驾....
只记得每次在方向盘前面,那摆脱不了的紧张感、畏惧感...
还有那无数的推卸理由...

也不知是可悲还是可笑,作为一个男人,竟然连驾车也不敢...
出游时,还得依靠妈妈,依靠朋友...
就连想要和他人出去,也不敢说去载他 ...
平时说的自己有多厉害,可是却如此没用....
这样的我, 还可以让人依靠吗 ????

阴影,无聊的理由,却走不出来 ...
偶尔想到了,就以其他理由逃避它 ...
要不,就是想办法发泄一下心情... 就像现在这样...

如果说,你看见了这篇部落格,
觉得很抱歉,或不好意思,
请你不要这样, 因为这只会让我更痛心;
这不是你的错,你也不知内情,何罪之有呢?
要怪的话,就怪我自己的无能吧....
是我对不起你 ....

Thursday, June 6, 2013

私の企鹅妹妹哪有这么可爱!

感觉不久前,你才为我写了一篇部落格......虽说是半强迫式的 =_='' 当时看了我真的超~~~感动的!! 没想到,这么快就轮到我为你写回一篇了,好好感谢我吧 ! 

怎么说呢,认识你也应该快一年了,不过感觉上这一年当中真的发生了很多很多事。还记得第一天认识你时,还曾以为你是哪家的小妹妹陪哥哥来见识一下大学,没想到....重点是,当时对你的印象其实都还不深刻,只记得你为素昧平生的我扣上了袖子的纽扣,还笑笑地开玩笑说怕就只有那小猫两三只读心理学(笑)。后来,我俩也各分了东西... 谁会料到当时的小邂逅,会有今天此般接近的关系呢 ?^^

你啊,最厉害的就是每天都说我欺负你,作弄你~ 都不会感受一下我对你的关心哦 =3= !! 感觉上我对其他的妹妹们都没如此‘体贴’呢! 骄傲了吧,别身在福中不知福哦! *自大中* 不过说真的,在众多的朋友当中,始终认为最懂我的,非你莫属了~

考试压力大,有你陪葬;小小的感情问题,有你诉苦;就连纯粹想找人闲聊、谈谈心声时,你还是最佳人选。不知是否是因为这些经历,我俩才有如此纯属的感情呢,还是因为性格本来都挺合得来的,所以才会一起经历了那么多?双子和水瓶嘛~ 不管怎样,现在的你,对我来说已是一位无法取代的....企鹅?不知你又如何想法呢? :P


像金鱼?这可是100%纯正的企鹅哦~!

可能是因为这样,所以很多人都自然而然的认为我们是情侣吧。可笑的是,会不会真的因为这样,我们就.... 都找不到男女朋友了呢(囧)?不过就算是真的,应该也无所谓吧。感情这种东西是可遇不可求的;而一段真诚的友谊,是我们上辈子修回来的福;一段可贵的‘兄妹’情,更不用说啦!若要说有什么遗憾的话,就是干嘛这么迟才认识你啊 !! (囧 x 2 )

如果说你有什么缺点的话,可能是有时太认真了吧 .... 不过有时却挺疯癫的,所以说是偶尔会很反常?当然我也没什么资格说你,因为自己也不是正常到哪里去 (汗)。可能总觉得还不够认识你吧;感觉上都是我在分享我的世界多点似的(囧 x 3 ) ~ 不过往好的方面想,这也代表你还有许多不为人知、有趣的一面咯~! 不知你还有什么 笑话 特色没展示出来呢?  ^^

总而言之,感谢谢你肯成为我这个不中用的哥哥的小妹~ 大家都说嘛,哥哥通常都是最最最疼小妹的啊!所以说,以后还要多多关照咯! 祝你生日快乐,我最可爱的企鹅妹妹! 虽说今年可能无法在你生日当天陪你庆祝,或为你唱首生日歌,不过你放心,礼物那些一定会到! 不过可能迟点罢了:P 在此显现上我满满的祝福吧! :D


P 家族的可爱小妹,外号 Kit Kat 的小企鹅,仅有一只哦! 想要的人,先过了俺这关再说吧!!! 除了我以外,谁也不准欺负她!! *莫名地燃烧中* :P


私の企鹅妹妹就是这么可爱!羡慕吧?


Thursday, May 23, 2013

Chapter #25 : Punishment

感觉上自己开始变得散漫了。
读书不用心,一直找借口乘机休息,浪费时间。
虽说我已复习完了,不过感觉上还是什么都没进脑似的....

前几天,家人跟我说,不要给自己太大压力,
人终不会是完美的,一个不小心,还是会跌倒的。
到时候,压力则会像重力般压垮你,
才知道自己一向来多么愚昧,
却又改变不了什么...
.
给了自己几个重拳,意思上地惩罚了自己,
但又有何用处呢?
处于懒惰和积极之间,真的很难。
只希望考试能快点来临,快点结束,
至少可以结束这场对不起自己的闹剧....

其他的,就听天由命吧。

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Chapter #24 : 压力

当你连出去吃饭都觉得是浪费时间 ;

当你认为冲凉和晚餐是你仅有的休息 ;

当你休息时脑海里充满问题与不安 ;

当你一度想过逃避,却又不敢失去 ;

那,又何苦呢 ?

那,又有何意义呢 ?

但,又能怎么样呢....?

Monday, May 13, 2013

Chapter #23 : Kings & peasants

When 99% of the peasants,
look up upon the 1% of kings,
they see awe, glory, jealousy,
and a never ending climb.

Yet when the 1% of kings,
look upon a mirror,
they see pain, and the cost of the throne,
for even when there's no ladder to climb,
there's always the chance to fall.

And occasionally,
when the 1% of kings,
looks down from their thrones,
they do not see the 99% of peasants.
Instead, they see the millions of corpses,
they unknowingly trampled upon.

But maybe, even the 1% of kings,
is but an illusion, created by the peasants,
forever wanting more. 

Friday, April 26, 2013

Chapter #22 : Mirrors & Puppets

曾何几时才发现,自己像个扯线娃娃,
而镜子的另一面,已成我生存的世界,
而无知的木偶师,是站在镜面前的您...

待人的模式,以视木偶师的操作,
不同的表演者,呈现不同的人格,
愚昧的演出,或至上的化身,
全是您眼中的我, 完美的倒影;
而木偶的内心,又有否自我的存在...?

然而,一切不属于悲...
您,非为木偶师,而为真诚的观众,
站在镜面的污点前, 剪断了扯线,
还原了仅剩的自由,任由我表演.

但演出终会结束,表演终会腻,
届时的您,是否还会为我鼓掌?
害怕失去现有的仅有,
却不敢轻举地妄动...

您是谁,又或您包括谁,
您,又是否知道...? 

Monday, April 1, 2013

Chapter #21 : Lies


Thought you were nothing more than a passerby.
Thought everything would turn out fine.
Thought I was already over you.
Thoughts can be wrong.

Then again, what's the use of seeing the truth? 
You're still just a passerby.
Everything's still going to be fine.
And me..... I can still get over you.
It's not like you're that hard to forget.

I can. 

Still, some lies are better left intact. 

It's not deception.
It's just holding onto fairy tales. 


Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Chapter #20 : Why?

Considering everything that has happened.
How things are right now, and
All that ever will be.
Yet, why do I still see you the way I do?

Though you fly high above my world,
Why do I still reach out for you desperately....yet cowardly?
If only I knew... If only you knew...

Then again... even if you did,
would it made a difference...?

Even if I'm sure,
can I make the difference...? 

If only I knew....


Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Side Story #1 : Equivalent exchange?

The world never cease to change,
and along with it, life.
Yet not all transitions follow the law of equivalent exchange.
Sometimes, what you've lost is far worse than what you've gained.

And even then,
you can never be sure,
that what you've gain,
would really be what you wanted most,
or what needed you most....

It's showtime... or is it the end?

Monday, February 18, 2013

Chapter #17 : Chronos' favor

Originated from an iota of the puzzle,
a simple question;
a fragment, lost in time, 
with it, the allusion of the bestowal to come.

Time pass, memories forgotten,
only to lay pavement for the day,
though it was not apparent... not yet.

Routines follow suit,in it the Pierrot,
unaware of the stage was set. 
* Click. Click. Click* 
It's showtime.
The sound subsequent by moving images,
of wishes and smiles,
of effort, amusement and style.
Of you, in it, with tears held back.

A cake, a smile, a thousand lights,
A trip to the Pole, where memories were shared.
A smile, a round, a promise of wonder,
Of spice, of indulgence, of a miracle uncovered.
And with it, the truth
the final piece of the whole,
where fragments fell into union.
And with it, it held,
the favor of Chronos.

.......


A fragment of time, perfected with a dash of sweets ~  

.......

Following so far ? Still haven't gave up ? Good ~ !! :P
But really, even without the gifts and the cake, I still had the best birthday in my life.
So what if it's not perfect?
I enjoyed every second of it, the video, the teases, the togetherness with my closest and dearest.
(Though I did enjoy some part of the video more than others. Guess which part?  xP )


I really wanna thank everyone, especially Penguin and Peacock, for the effort spent in this.
I half-expected a cake, but a video compilation of wishes???? That really blew me away!! 
And the timepiece!!! OMG it looks so nice!! and to think back, how long ago was this planned beforehand... really really touched !! Now I can tell the time without pulling out my phone!!
..... well, sorta... I still have to guess which time is correct xD
Though I might not show much emotions just now, I actually had to hold a very straight face to push back the tears.
Not good crying in front of everyone, especially the juniors eh? >_<


To kyen da jie, 
QS er jie, 
Suzie san jie, 
Sammy mommy, 
Shu-yi *future sister (?)* , 
Peacock bro Allistair, 
My cute penguin Weiwei ~ 


Thanks for everything that ever was, ever is, and ever will. 



P/s : Thank you QS for the chocolate. Owh and if one day you happen to stumble upon this post.... nice boots, you look amazing xP 


Thursday, February 14, 2013

Chapter #16 : Valentine Effect


当每首高分贝的歌,是我想你的前奏.

当每个轻微的误会,是我着急的理由.

当每个过去的照片,是我挂念的元素.

当每个随意的日梦,是你浮现的镜头.

猜不透, 自己要的是什么;

看不穿,如心跳般难触摸.

追逐你的腳步, 感受你的溫度,

是我等你的执著?

还是说,这只是一场梦,

出自于习惯,把爱当成喜欢?

愛,只不过是生命的莫測,

快乐,也不再像原来般简单....



The Valentine effect. 
Let's hope it stays that way.  

Friday, January 25, 2013

Chapter #15 : Ohana, Part II

'.... or forgotten. '
                                     - Lilo and Stitch


Part II of my family post, and this time I'll be emphasizing on my current family by choice, aka my friends from university. Though our class is small, there's still an obvious trend of people forming into social groups. In my case, I'm affiliated to the P family, a group of 'siblings' with codenames of animals starting with the letter P xD

Seriously though, who came up with this P thingy? I know it started with Peacock and Penguin, but why can't we pick animals that doesn't start with P? I wanted be a fox, goes well with my name Sly don't ya think? :P

*ahem*

Personally I find myself very fortunate to have found this bunch of friends. It's only been 3 months since we first knew each other, and yet we've been through a lot together. The me you see now, the "improved" me, can all be contributed to them. They've been my support, my catalyst to change. They're my living proof that friendship doesn't depend on how long you've known each other, but how well you do. I'm really looking forward to spending my still-long-to-go uni life, and getting to know these family members of mine even better! :)

Now to describe the members further, based on mua's personal point of view ^^
(P/s : I'm the eldest, the gor gor of the lot  :P )



Disclaimer : What I'm about to say are all based on personal views. Please refrain from resorting to violence or death sentences if you find it too.... whatever you find it to be that makes you wanna obliterate my existence. Proceed with own risk. You have been warned..... please? ):



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3rd eldest : Allistair Adam, aka Peacock
The only other male in the family, and my arch enemy in class if you will it. A little crazy, VERY power hungry, and is a total jacket freak. He also has the tendency to lose his brain in certain cases. The truth is, he is the guy that changed my perception towards males, albeit only a little. In a way, I see parts of myself in him, thus a better perception of my own self. He's also my competitor, as I always look towards him for competition, which in turn pushes me to extends that I've not known I'm capable of. He is one of the few guys that I respect wholeheartedly, Without him, I doubt I'll be anywhere near the person I am now.


Da jie :  Kyen Tsoo, aka Puppy (?)
The big sister (2nd eldest) of the lot, and one that always carry a smile.. though don't let that smile deceive you... very very very very skinny girl though. Funnily enough, I've started uni thinking that she's one of the very very quiet types. Not that she's very loud or anything ,but still :P She always seem so nice, never having a temper, though sometimes she can be a little  evil  mischievous. However she's very humble and nice, and have lend me a helping hand countless times. She always leave a good impression no matter when or what the situation is, and talking to her never seem to impose the slightest hint of pressure. Too bad she's taken :P

p/s : my mom consider her as the prettiest girl among my friends. Extra info doesn't hurt xP


Er jie : QS, aka Panda 
The more logical and cool sister, though that's not always true.... at least not the logical part xP. I first met her during the password test, though I didn't paid much attention then. It was during orientation that she caught my eye, as I thought that she looked familiar. A very cute girl, though sometimes a little cold IMO ^^'' I actually found it hard to talk to her at first, though as time passes she's actually quite nice to get along with. She's also very skilled at arts and crafts, as evident from our many times working together. I very much like her style of dressing ( the matchup of black & white + the style is perfect!), and her personality makes her that much more unique! An interesting girl indeed, one that I really wanna make an effort to know better of, though that might be a little hard to approach ^^''


San jie : Suzie, aka Possum
If you've been following my blog since chapter #1, then surely you've known her already. Used to be a cute girl, but after her haircut she's now a stylish cute girl xD Has a cheeky laugh ( :P) , and can always been seen smiling. A huuge fan of chocolate, and also a huuuuuge fan of anime, even bigger than me! Interesting enough, ever since orientation, I think I've been in the same group with her for at least 80% of every group activity, be it group projects, mini discussions, clubs or what not. Weird huh? Guess in that sense I kinda mixed with her the most, at least until..... well at least the awkwardness doesn't exist anymore ^^ Anyway, personally I find her to have this eighteen-year-old-dressing-like-adult-hence-having-a-cute-yet-feminine-look, so yeah she's pretty ^^. A nice easy going girl, though when time requires she can still put up a good attitude. (Y)


Xiao mei : Yik Wei, aka Penguin
Another sister that makes a lot of appearance in my blog, and a very cute one at that! Funnily enough she's actually older than Possum and Panda !.... just not so much in sense of height xP She always accuses me of bullying her though, while I'm merely showing my way of caring for my little sister! ): Very fun to talk to, always willing to make jokes and do nonsense with me xD She has provided me with a lot of support in my time of stress during EOS, and for that I'm really grateful. :) She also very responsible in what she's doing, and would sometimes even take on the role of "big sister" and plans for everything! ....though I still find a very strong urge of protecting her :3  If you've been following my blog then you'd already have a good idea on what she means to me. Love her loads !! 

Side note: her hair is very soft and it's nice to pat her head :P


Sister-to-be-pulled-in : Shu yi, aka .... errrrr.... ??? 
Not exactly one of our family member, though I guess she deserves a slight mention as well. A very pretty girl with big round eyes and can pass as a korean. I used to think that she's a very classy non-sociable girl... how wrong have I been xD She's sweet, but still she still makes jokes, talk nonsense and is very friendly :P Don't really know her that well but I have a very good impression of her. ^^ It also helps that she sometimes bully weiwei with me as well :P


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That's all for now! There's still a lot to talk about them, though I think I better leave the rest for myself for my own safety ^^'' I sincerely hope that in the years to come, we'll be even more closer. Without you all, I'm nothing, and I'm proud of that. =D


Chapter #14 : Ohana, Part I

'Ohana means family. Family means no one gets left behind... '
                                                                                           - Lilo and Stitch 

Just thought of starting off my post with a famous quote from Lilo & Stitch, since it's related to the word family. Frankly speaking, I'm not exactly sure of the term family. As those who've known we well enough would know, my family ain't exactly up for the best family award. However, I've grown to accept life as it is, for better or worse, and life's been acceptable thus far :)

Owh and speaking of family, there's a new family member in the house! Meet NiNi, the toy poodle! I shall let the pictures do the talking now ^_^ 



Warning : Uber cuteness alert ! Possible symptoms include squealing, shouting, jealousy, intentions to commit crimes of stealing, and even death by cuteness. Proceed at your own risk. You have been warned ! 



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NiNi, the poodle~ 


Small and cute~


*Sip sip*


Blurring~


*Stare *


*Stare summore*


Grrr~!!


Stuck!! >_<


Night night~



Penguin don't jealous yeah ~ :P

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Chapter #13 : Melody

Went out with my uni mates for karaoke session yesterday, and it was a blast ! I must say, if there's 2 obvious talents in my psychology class, it's :

a) Having fun, going crazy and NOT look like university students
b) Singing

Seriously. Everywhere you look, there's bound to be someone that's awesome in singing. Too bad not everyone shared that passion (I'm looking at you penguin and da jie! Yes I know you two read my blog xP ) . No matter, I'm sure in the   coming months we'll be infecting both of you  with the singing virus ~ xP

.......
..........

Owh, and did I mention yesterday was also our results day for our first EOS exam? Yeah....though everything went better than expected! c:


My results~!  


Yup, a CGPA of 3.94 ! I'd be lying if I said I'm not happy with my results ! Though far more than happiness , was the feeling of contend. I'm just happy that my effort and tears did not go into waste TvT 

Yet I must say, I am a lil' 'disappointed' in my A- . YES I KNOW I SOUND VERY PROUD AND COCKY NOW, but seriously, I could half-guess why I got an A- instead of an A, and it has nothing to do with having not study enough or something like that. I guess it's kinda the "so near, yet so far" feeling? Ahh well, can't do anything about it now.
.....

Well, technically, I CAN retake, but that'll be crazy and I'm sure my friends will be looking at me with this " OMG are you serious can you please go die " look and refuse to talk to me ever again, so nah ~ :P

Anyway, I really have to thank my cute lil' penguin for everything. Seriously, without her, I doubt I'd have the will to push myself to study without breaking under my own self-induced stress.She was supportive and put up with my nonsense throughout our study break, in addition to her condition and stress level. I'm even starting to think whether I can even get above 3.5 if it weren't for her. >.< 

Glad to say her grades are quite awesome as well despite being sick throughout the study break and exam period. Really proud and happy for you lil' penguin! ♥ 


Now, what to do for the remainder of my 2 weeks holidays.... ?


Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Chapter #12 : Sorrow?

What's more scarier?

The fact that you had to live through your nightmares again, or the fact that you don't even care anymore?

For years I've knew my life was never the reality. Fragile links, broken pieces, and an illusion to mask up the truth. That's my world.

Now and then, the cloak falls off, revealing the truth that everyone knows, yet will never admit. The world comes crashing down, until the time the cloak is placed on again. Back to square 1. Rinse and repeat.

But what if, one day, you no longer care? Not that you try not to care, or hide your feelings inside, but from the bottom of your heart, you no longer can? 

Once upon a time, tears were still shed. 
Once upon a time, feelings were still hidden.
Once upon a time, souls were still torn.

But once upon a time, was never meant to last forever. 

Tears stopped flowing,

Feelings stopped showing,
And souls could no longer be torn.
When that day comes, what have you become?

I'm afraid. Not at the nightmare, not anymore. 
I'm afraid of  the person I am becoming, or have already become.

Today marks the death of my soul.
Or has it already been dead since long ago?

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Sometimes I wonder if I'm never meant to have any happy moments, or that all my happiness must be compensated with equal sorrow.

It was only yesterday, that I had my first, unforgettable trip with my friends from university. Though we only meet for 3 months, I could undoubtedly say they meant a lot to me. Laughter and screams, joys and teases, and truth sharing moments. Now, this.

I miss that moment already.
Save me.

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Chapter #11 : Memories & Reality


"Together with the knights, 
open a path, 
and look upon the young king."

Had an unexpected "visit" from a long-time friend yesterday. An important friend. A memory. 

Now it's not that I haven't seen or talk to her for a long time, heck she's even in the same university as me! But nonetheless it was a nice time chatting with her, of exams and holidays and random stuff.

Then she told me :



"Actually there's a thing gonna tell you.
You really changed a lot.
Became a better person :) "


Really never expected that, at least not from a friend who I've known for at least 10 years.

Then I was thinking, have I really changed that much?

Sure there's the dressing style and hair style and all, but am I all that different from merely a few years, or maybe even only a few months ago?

Some of my university friends rated me as confident, outspoken, always seem to aim for the sky and what-not. But would they regard me as the same if they've seen how I was in high school? Would they believe I'm the same person they know if they've known me earlier? I wonder.... 

I've once read in a Facebook post, that one thing about university is, it's a place to start afresh. No one knows or cares about your background, or how you were before this. It's a place to reshape your image, to show the world what you want them to see. I'm starting to believe this. :)

Let's just hope that she'll like this me as well, whoever she may be ^^



*dot dot dot*



Owh, and I got a Rilakkuma gift, all the way from Japan !!! xD
Both the head and the flag waves at you !! It's just so adorable!! 

Yeah, this is part of me as well xP


Rilakkuma !! Thanks Suzie~ ♥ 


Thursday, January 3, 2013

Chapter #10 : Harmless

Just finished my second exam paper. Can't say it was extremely easy but.... let's say I had a strong feeling of getting a very good grade. All was well and good, even after the exam and all the way till I reached home. Then emptiness fell through.

Ever had the feeling of void?
A feeling of wanting to do something to fill that gap inside,
yet unmotivated to do anything at all?

Maybe it's the stressed release after completing my 2 papers,
maybe it's because the next paper is days ahead,
and maybe I really needed to let go and rest...

but I just can't. No matter what I do, or what I DON'T do,
the sense of uneasiness is still there.

Have I lost my fangs?
Have I lost my claws?
Have I lost the will to strive;
the will to live in the world of prowess?
Have I become contend with being.... common?

.... Is it because of that sudden realization that...
Slowly, but surely....I'm losing you?

I'm lost.... yet I must move on.

Hopefully by dawn,
my claws will shine once more,
with a heart shooting for the moon;
Never reachable, yet never ceasing to try. 



Save me.